My Unconventional Life
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I have to say, right up front, that I had no idea how unusual my life
was until I was about fourteen. And I also need to say that I'm fully aware many of you may feel, at least initially, that this is a tale of abuse, or molestation or the like.
But what I want you to understand is that my life wasn't anything like that at all.
And that's why I want to tell my story. I wasn't molested. I was loved. And I'll always be glad that I was
loved in the fashion I was.
So please, don't frown, or grumble. This is a tale of joy and
happiness. Besides. I didn't actually lose my virginity
until I was sixteen, which is a whole year older than the age of
consent in a half of America and three quarters of the rest of the
world. And even the phrase "lost my virginity" is not the right phrase for what happened to me. Not the way most women would mean it. So put your personal morals on hold for a bit. Uncle
Bob did not molest me.
Even if he sort of practiced at it for
But let me just tell you how it all happened. Then you'll see why I'm so happy about my very unconventional life.
My name is Kylie. I'm the youngest of triplets. My oldest
sibling is Shannon and our brother is Brinn. We're fraternal,
which means that somehow mom squirted three eggs out of her ovaries
about the same time our father(s) squirted several million sperms into
her vagina. The reason I used the conditional plural for "father" is that we
don't actually know who our father(s) is/are. That's because mom
got pregnant at a beach party while she was on winter break down in Mexico when she was in her senior year of high school. She doesn't remember much of it, except drinking
something that was sweet and made her feel like she could fly.
She also remembers seeing three naked guys standing over her, but
that's about it. She woke up naked on the beach, and could tell
she'd had sex. Her "friends," who had said they'd take care of her, were nowhere around.
We didn't actually learn all this until we were
fifteen, but I'm telling you now because it may help explain why she
did some of the things she did, after that happened to her. Mom was pretty unconventional to
start with, so it's probably no huge surprise to some people that we
triplets were raised a little weird too.
Anyway, when we asked about our father, as all kids eventually do, what
she told us was that she couldn't remember him, which was okay, but she
also couldn't remember the sex, which was sort of a tragedy. I mean a girl should be able to remember her first time.
Yes, I know that this kind of first time might not be the best memory. After all, she was gangbanged by (at least) three guys who didn't really give a crap about the girl they were fucking. But what if she liked them? I mean they might have been the guys she dreamed of having a first time with ... right? See how complicated this can get?
Anyway, you might think that not knowing who our father was bummed us kids out. We would
eventually find out that we were the result of what amounted to rape,
both ethically and legally. Of course we didn't find that out
until we were fifteen, like I said, and by then we had already gotten
used to the idea that our dad was stupid because he'd run out on us,
and that meant he'd never get to know us, which made him a real loser.
So we never really missed him.
Besides that, Uncle Bob was always there as a father figure. He
was there from as early as I can remember anything. I have misty,
hazy memories of him clear back to when I was four, I think, but it's
hard to tell because we've always lived in the same house and so has
Uncle Bob. Mom got a job in the mill while she was
pregnant. Our Grandma worked there, and got mom the job.
Grandpa was a soldier and he got shot up and couldn't work, so when we
were born, he took care of us while Mom and Grandma were at work.
I don't remember any of that part, because that was while we were just
babies. And way back then, the way Uncle Bob describes it, his job involved
driving some important guy around in a big, fancy car, and he lived in a
trailer house. There was more to it than that, but I'll get to that in a minute.
I know this doesn't sound very unconventional. That part comes
next. It was sad, at least for the grownups, but it was pretty
normal, I guess.
Anyway, where things started to get different was one day when Uncle Bob
was driving his boss around and these guys tried to assasinate him.
They had machine guns and hand grenades, or something like that, and
Uncle Bob saved his boss, but got kind of blown up in the
process. He doesn't talk about that, or who his boss was, but it
had to be somebody important, because he got to retire and they pay him
a boatload of money to be retired on. He limps, but other than that you can't tell
he ever got exploded, or whatever.
So by the time I remember being around Uncle Bob, it was after he
already had the ranch. He calls where he lives "The Ranch" even
though there aren't any cows or horses or anything like that
there. There are barns and stuff, but no animals. It's way
out in the middle of a forest in Wyoming, and the driveway is like two
miles long. I'm trying to describe it the way I remembered it
back then. That's because it was home to me, for all intents
and purposes. We spent more time there than we did at our
house, which was in Colorado.
Okay, so the very first memory I have of Uncle Bob is of him lying on
one of those fold up bed thingies beside the pool, and he stood up with
a smile on his face.
And he was naked.
I remember my mom running and slamming into him, and they hugged and
made all these happy noises, and I looked at Shannon and Brinn and they
looked back at me. It was pretty clear to me they didn't know any more
than I did about what was going on. So we just stood there, kind of
pressed together while this naked man we had never seen was hugging our
Then he kissed her. On the lips.
Now that wasn't strange, in and of itself. We all kissed each
other on the lips. It was just kissing. We did it every day
at one time or another. Mom kissed us, and we kissed each
other. Though sometimes Shannon and I kissed Brinn on each of his
cheeks at the same time. That's because people thought that was
cute and they gave us candy and cookies and stuff when we did that.
But we'd never seen our mother kiss a man. She hugged and kissed Grandma and Grandpa, but no other adults.
Now, of course, we know that this was right after Uncle Bob got out of
the hospital and had just bought the ranch with all the money they gave
him. And the pool was brand new, because when he bought the
ranch, it didn't have a swimming pool there, and he wanted one and he
had all this money, so he just had some people come and build one.
Anyway, we stayed there at Uncle Bob's ranch for a while. I don't
know how long. It was probably only a few days, because Mom was
still working then. But that was when we found out that we didn't
have to wear any clothes when we were at Uncle Bob's ranch. Mom
didn't wear clothes either. Of course we had seen each other
without clothes on lots of times. When it was bath time, we took
baths together, and we had played in the sprinkler naked. That's
about the only other memory I have from back then. And we saw Mom
without clothes on sometimes, but then she always dressed us and put
clothes on herself too. So this was really different, that first
time we went to Uncle Bob's house.
The other thing I remember was that we still slept in the same bed at
Uncle Bob's, just like we did at home, but Mom slept in the same bed as
Uncle Bob. That was different. Shannon was whiny at
bedtime. She's always been that way. And she was always
getting out of bed and going into Mom's bedroom and asking for a drink,
or saying she had to go potty or something. Sometimes Brinn and I
would go with her, but it wasn't worth it, because Mom got mad about it
usually. But this time, in this new place, when Shannon got up
and went to find Mom, we snuck along behind her. And that's how I
know Mom was in Uncle Bob's bed, because I saw them. I heard Mom
laugh and say, "See? I told you she would." And Uncle Bob
laughed and jumped out of bed and caught Brinn and me and picked us
up. I started to cry, because I was scared, but all he did was
hug us and say everything was fine. He took us back to the room
we were staying in and told us a long story. I remember it was a
really great story, but I don't remember what it was about.
Anyway, we went back home and everything went back to normal, meaning
Grandpa took care of us while Mom and Grandma worked and we all wore
clothes all the time again.
The next time I saw Uncle Bob was when he came to visit us for our
fifth birthday party. He brought presents, Barbies for me and
Shannon and a fire truck for Brinn. He stayed for a long time,
which I now know was probably a week, but that seemed like a long time
to us. He didn't take his clothes off then, except at night when
he got in bed with Mom. We just figured they liked to sleep
together, like the three of us liked to sleep together. I loved
snuggling with my brother and sister, because it was warm, and they
smelled good and I felt safe. There was a monster who lived in
our closet, but he wouldn't come out if all three of us were hugging or touching each other.
The next summer we went to visit Uncle Bob again. Again he was
naked when we got there and after she hugged him, Mom took her clothes
off and asked us kids if we wanted to swim. Uncle Bob had these
cool shirt things we could wear that were real thick. I know now
they were life jackets, but I didn't know that then. All we knew
was that they were cool because they helped us float and we didn't have
to worry about getting our faces wet by going under water. He had
this fence thing in the pool that kept us all at one end, and with the
life jackets on, our toes could barely touch the bottom. We
learned to bounce up and down to get around and I remember we played
tag for a long time. Uncle Bob and Mom laid down on a towel on
the outside of the pool. Actually, Mom sat on top of Uncle Bob
and tried to squish him by bouncing up and down, like Shannon tried to
squish Brinn and me when we were wrestling.
I know what you're thinking. You know what they were doing. I do too, now.
But I'm telling it to you like I remember it back then, because you
have to understand how things happened, and how we felt about all this
while it was happening.
Over the next few years we visited Uncle Bob lots of times and it was
just like that. Mom taught us the word "nudist" and said Uncle
Bob was a full time nudist and we were part time nudists. Brinn
argued with her and said Uncle Bob couldn't be a full time nudist
because when he came to visit us, he didn't take his clothes off.
"Unless he's in bed with you," said Shannon. "He's always a nudist when he gets in bed with you."
I remember this shocked look on my mom's face when Shannon said
this. We were eight, I think. I still remember how Shannon
said this because of that look on my mom's face. You know how a
little kid says something that's obvious, and says it in an obvious
manner. It doesn't actually mean anything special, they're just
pointing out how obvious something is. And Shannon (and the rest
of us) still didn't understand that Mom and Uncle Bob were having
sex. It wouldn't be much longer before we came to that
realization, but we didn't know it then. Of course now that I'm
older, and remember how things sounded and looked that day, I know it sounded like Shannon knew they were having sex, and that's why Mom got that look on her face. Her face turned real red, too.
Then she said, "Well ... we love each other!"
You know how an adult says something and the kids all look at each
other like someone has just announced that the sun will come up
tomorrow ... and everybody already knows that the sun will come up
tomorrow ... so the kids are kind of confused as to why that was said?
Then Brinn asked a question that would change all of our lives forever. We just didn't know it at the time.
"Mommy? What does loving each other have to do with being a nudist?"
Mom looked around, kind of like she was looking for somebody, maybe, but of course the only ones there were us kids.
"What I mean is that since we love each other, it's fine to be nudists
together. But we wouldn't want to be nudists with strangers," she
said. Her voice sounded funny, and if we'd been just a few years
older we probably would have reacted differently to what she'd just
said. But we weren't, and she was our mom, so we just said,
"Okay," and went on with life, you know?
The point is that it became clear to the adults that we kids were
getting old enough to notice things they hadn't had to worry about
Now you might think that would have changed the way Uncle Bob and Mom
acted when they were around us. You have to remember that I was
just there, and being a kid, and probably not paying all that much
attention to what was going on. But I don't remember there being
any big changes or anything. If we were at the ranch, and we
watched a movie, we probably watched it naked and Uncle Bob and Mom sat
together on the couch and cuddled, and us kids cuddled somewhere
else. He had bean bag chairs for each of us, and we liked them
sometimes, but usually we didn't, because all three of us wouldn't fit
on just one bean bag. So usually we'd make a kind of fort out of
the bean bags and huddle in the middle of that. We also liked to
sit in the recliner, together. And Mom and Uncle Bob would smooch
and touch each other.
It was the smooching and touching each other that eventually taught us
what was really going on between them, by the way. Brinn figured
it out first. We were nine and it was the end of the school
day. For some reason the school decided it wasn't a good idea for
all three of us to be in the same classroom. But they only had
two classes for the fifth grade, so they put Brinn in one class and
Shannon and me in the other. At the end of the day we rode the
same bus home, of course, and Shannon and I were waiting beside the
door for Brinn when he came tearing up to us looking all excited.
I could tell you what was said, but I'll just summarize. Some
boys had dared him to "smooch" with Brenda Dickman, who was in their
class. He was supposed to kiss her and put his hand on her
"boobies." And he asked, "Why?" and these guys laughed and said
it was "having sex" and that they'd all done it and he should
too. So, being stupid, Brinn went up and tried to kiss Brenda and
ran his hand in a circle over her chest and she yelled and Miss
Chambers got involved. So he told her what he was doing and why
he was doing it and she scolded him and said gentlemen don't try to
take advantage of a lady. When he promised he'd never do anything
like that again, she went and collected up the guys who had dared him
and took them to the principal's office. It was a really
big scandal. For two weeks after that Brenda said Brinn was her
boyfriend and that they were going to get married and all that.
Anyway, that's when we found out that what our mother and Uncle Bob
were doing when they kissed and touched each other was having sex.
This, of course, was a huge deal. You might think it was a huge
deal because they were brother and sister. But that wasn't the
thing. What the thing was, was that while we knew that "people"
had sex, we didn't actually know anybody who we knew
was actually having sex. Remember, we were little kids, with only
part of the facts, and with only a smidgen of experience in the
world. Of course we knew hundreds of adults who were having
sex. We just didn't know we knew that. We simply didn't
understand how all that worked back then. We didn't know what we
didn't know. That's what being a kid is like. It's like
living in a picture puzzle that hasn't been all put together yet.
Besides that, there were other things going on at that time in our
lives that were distractions. Take, for instance, the fact that
Uncle Bob bought a horse. To us he was this huge, scary black
beast, at least at first. But when he put us on the saddle, the
whole world changed for us. Suddenly we were seven feet tall, and
everything looked completely different. Even buildings looked
Of course when we rode him, we got dressed. We also got dressed
when we went for a hike, or played games outside in the woods behind
the house. We had never explored the vast pasture up to that
point, but the horse was the perfect way to do that. Of course, if we wanted to ride him, somebody had to go get him and he
was usually out in the pasture somewhere. Uncle Bob left a halter
on him with a piece of rope hanging down and one of our favorite things
became the "rescue the horse" where we went out into the dangerous
world and brought him safely back to the barn. We wouldn't know
for years that that horse could have taken on a mountain lion and won
the fight. But with us, he was as gentle as could be. That first year,
all three of us would fit into the big saddle on his back. If
Uncle Bob didn't put us there, we could walk him over to the board
fence of the corral and climb up on that to get to the saddle. Of
course the only place we could ride without an adult along was in the corral, but we didn't
care. We were only nine. And those few times they hiked through the pasture while we rode were glorious.
It was the year we were ten that everything changed. With no
warning whatsoever, Mom sat us all down and asked if we'd like to go
live at the ranch all the time. There had been, as you can
imagine (but we couldn't at the time) a lot of discussion between Mom
and Uncle Bob about ... things. They really were besotted with
each other, though we kids didn't understand that yet. Nor did we
know that their love affair went clear back to the very first time Mom
went out on a date (it was to a school dance) and the boy who took her
out wouldn't talk to her or look at her or touch her. She didn't
know he was scared half to death, just like she was. And when she
got home she went to her room and cried because she thought she was
ugly or something. Uncle Bob heard her and went to see what was
wrong. He was sixteen, a couple of years older than she was, and
he tried to convince her she wasn't ugly. I guess she didn't
believe him and, being a boy, he thought one way to prove it was to
show her his erection, which he said she was responsible for, because
she looked so hot in her dress. Let's just say that she was
finally convinced. The point is that from that point on, if she
was interested in some mating ritual, or curious about some aspect of
teenage sexual exploration, she had a trusted male handy to work that
out with. We didn't get a whole lot more details than that,
but you can just imagine what it must have been like to have that
trusted male handy right next door to your bedroom.
Anyway, this history, though we didn't know it then, was actually very
important, because as we all know, history repeats itself.
You see, it was actually Brinn who had cold feet about moving to the
ranch. And the reason he had cold feet was because of Brenda
Dickman. She still thought Brinn was her boyfriend, and he'd kind
of gotten used to that idea too, even though they rarely even talked to
each other. Kids at that age just believe things, without
empirical evidence to back it up, you know? But Brinn was pretty
sure he'd never get another girlfriend if he left this one behind.
So Shannon and I said we'd be his girlfriends.
He made us promise we'd be his girlfriends forever, and when we did, he said, "Okay."
It should probably be said, here, that this conversation about us being
his girlfriends didn't take place in front of our mother. When we
hadn't burst into cheers immediately (we girls could tell instantly
that something was bothering Brinn) she had frowned and said, "Think
about it," and gone off to call Uncle Bob, probably in a panic, now
that I think about it. Anyway, she was so happy when we all went
to find her and said we wanted to move, that she didn't ask any
questions. Actually, as things have turned out, I don't know if
knowing why Brinn said he'd move would have made any difference.
The point is that when we were almost eleven, we moved to the ranch.
There is a difference between being a part time nudist, who lives in
Colorado, and visits their full time nudist uncle for a week at a time,
and living with a full time nudist. Uncle Bob found out about
that difference too. I suppose, in one sense, that's what this
story is all about. I have to warn you, at this point, that
things might get a little jumbled up for a little while, and it may
seem like I'm going off on tangents as I tell you what happened.
But that's only because lots of different things were all going on at
the same time over the next few years. These things weren't all
separated out in nice, neat little packets that you could walk around
and examine, and think about and come to terms with. They just
happened, whether we were ready for them or not.
Take for instance when Shannon and I had our first periods. I
guess they used to teach girls about that in school, but they don't any
more. They assume a girl's mother will take care of all
that. And our mother probably would have, except she had other
things on her mind. I think it surprised her as much as it did us
when Shannon suddenly started bleeding and thought she was dying.
Had we been normal people, she probably would have noticed it when she
removed a pair of bloody panties. But we were nudists. So
what happened was that she started feeling bad in a way she'd never
felt bad before (I'm not even trying to explain PMS to the men out there) and then blood ran down her leg.
Being of the same womb, at the same time, I was in sync with my sister,
so by the time Mom had dealt with Shannon's emergency, and mine came
along the very next day, she was well prepared to teach me what she'd
just taught my sister. It would have been better if Shannon
hadn't been there too, warning me of every bad thing that was about to
happen. By that I mean my Mom teaching me how to use a tampon,
since nudists don't use pads. So there was Shannon saying things
like, "This is going to hurt a lot at first, and you'll be sore.
I'm still sore and I only did it yesterday."
Brinn, of course, wasn't involved. Don't ask me why girls are
just naturally shy about having a period. Personally, I think
it's part of evolution or something. I mean, think about
it. A period is really a woman's body announcing that she just
failed to conceive a child and keep the species going. She could
have become pregnant ... but did not. And all that blood shouts
it to the world that she failed. I know we don't think about it
that way, but Mother Nature is a very powerful presence in our lives
and we ignore her to our peril in many cases. It's just a
theory. But most women will agree that there is a natural
reticence to boldly advertise you're on the rag. Now, add to
that, your brother pointing to the little white string hanging from
between your puffy labia and asking "What's that string thing coming
out of you?" and you get some idea of how unsettling something
completely normal can be.
And then there was the fact that, by then, we clearly knew that Mom and
Uncle Bob were doing things that we were pretty sure brothers and
sisters weren't supposed to do together. But the problem
was that in our memories, they had always
acted the way they acted now. And most ten-year-olds are at a
point where they understand that sometimes what "everybody knows" is
not necessarily true. At some point you move from blind
belief in whatever somebody says, to a healthy skepticism about most
In this case, the way things got resolved ... sort of ... was one night
about a week after we'd moved. It was early summer, and the
weather was beautiful in the afternoon. We were all out in the
pool, running around naked, as usual. Us kids knew how to swim
now, and didn't have to use the life jackets that had "lifeguarded" us
in the old days, so Uncle Bob and Mom could spend time together
"wrestling." So we finished a game of Marco Polo and Shannon
called us into a huddle, looking excited. She pointed and when
Brinn and I looked, there was Uncle Bob, on top of our mother, lunging
forwards and backwards while they kissed. He had gotten some
better chaise lounges, and they were lying on top of one of those.
Brinn marched off across the shallow end of the pool, climbed the ladder and went right up to them, dripping.
"Are you guys having sex?" he asked, just like that.
Uncle Bob said, "Shit," which was the first time we'd heard an adult
say that word right out loud, right in front of a bunch of kids.
Our mom made this moaning sound that we knew meant she was embarrassed.
Don't ask me why. They'd done this literally dozens of times in front
of us before this. Thinking back on it, I suspect they hadn't
planned any of those lovemaking sessions. They just started
fooling around and then got carried away and thought we were dumb kids
and wouldn't pay any attention or something. Adults frequently
think kids aren't paying attention. Of course frequently kids aren't paying attention. But not when adults are having sex right in front of them. Trust me on this.
So, anyway, they kind of half got up and half fell off of the chaise
lounge, during which Uncle Bob's erection became a feature of
interest. All three of us stared at it. Of course we'd seen
his penis hundreds of times. But not long and hard and wet
looking, and dripping this milky white stuff.
"Hey!" said Brinn. "That happens to me too!" He pointed at
Uncle Bob's penis. He frowned. "But it doesn't look like
that," he added, doubtfully.
The object which had captured all our attention flagged quickly.
It still looked thicker and bigger than usual. Sometimes Uncle
Bob's penis looked almost tiny, all tucked up like it had shrunk or
something. And sometimes it looked like a half-formed sausage,
maybe. But we'd never seen it as big as it had just been when he
pulled it out of our mother. So we were all a little shocked.
For some reason, our mother decided it was time for us to have "The
Talk." Yes, I'm referring to the vaunted "talk" that every parent
dreads having with their children. Don't ask me why she thought
that was the appropriate time, but she did. And Uncle Bob got
caught in the pattern of this parental shotgun blast, sitting there
with his sperm-covered, now-limp post coital penis as one of the visual
Understanding that, by then, we'd already received the information our
mother was trying to give us, you might not be as surprised as she was
when, at the end of her lecture, Brinn's only question was, "Are you
trying to get pregnant?"
"No!" moaned our mother.
Uncle Bob tried to help. "Sometimes people have sex just for fun."
Mom shot him a dark look. It was the only one I'd ever seen her give him.
"You're not helping, Bob," she said. "Go clean up. I'll finish up here."
He left and Mom looked at us.
"Look, you guys love each other, right?" We all nodded in
unison. "Well I love my brother too. Most people don't
understand it like we do, and the fact is that it's nobody else's
business what we do here on the ranch. We shouldn't have been
doing things in front of you kids, because you're too young to
understand it now. But someday you will understand, and we can have another discussion about it then. Okay?"
We nodded in unison again.
"Good!" she said, sounding relieved. She looked toward the
house. "I need a shower too," she said. "You guys can keep
swimming, but don't stay in too long. And if anybody gets out,
you all get out. Got it?"
It was a day for nodding in unison.
She left us thinking about what she'd said. You know ... about
loving her brother and it being nobody's business what happened between
brothers and sisters ... like having sex ...
I'm sure she would have said things a little differently if Brinn hadn't surprised her and gotten her off kilter.
But she didn't say them differently.
It was just one more little thing that propelled us forward to ...
Have you ever been trying to walk down a steep hill, and you start to
slide a little, and you have to take a giant step forward, and then
another one, until you're leaping wildly down the hill, trying to keep
your balance and make it to the bottom without falling?
That's a great metaphor for what happened to us that afternoon.
Our mother gave us the teensiest little push toward a slippery slope
that would have us tumbling helplessly downhill. It would take
years, but it would happen.
And please, even though I said Mom gave us that little push, please
don't blame her. She wasn't trying to do that. What she and
Uncle Bob had was something they'd come to terms with years ago.
They had agonized over it and worried about it, and finally decided
that their happiness was just as important as anyone else's. They
weren't trying to introduce us into an incestuous lifestyle. They
were simply acting out their own love, and we happened to see it.
They'd have been more circumspect about it if they'd have taken the
time to think about it more. But they'd been separated by all
that time Uncle Bob had gone to college and been a bodyguard or
whatever. And when they had a chance to get back together, they
jumped at it. And we were just little kids, and like most adults,
they thought we wouldn't pay any attention to what they were doing.
Maybe they fell down their own little hill, out of control.
The point is, nobody intended for their indiscretions to become our indiscretions.
Okay, so now you have a couple of examples of things that were going on
at that time in our lives. I think it's pretty fair to say most
kids don't experience the same kinds of things. At least not at
those levels. And that had a real impact on how things would play
out in the future too. It's all part of what I told you about in the
beginning ... about how unusual our lives were.
Initially, all the public displays of affection between Uncle Bob and
Mom stopped. They didn't even kiss any more in front of us
kids. We noticed that too, including the fact that there were
fewer smiles than there had been before. None of us kids had ever
been "in love" before. Not even Brinn considered his time with
Brenda to be like that. But we knew love existed, and we had seen
them exhibiting that love toward each other. We didn't talk about
it, but I think we worried when that exhibition of joy and happiness
stopped taking place.
What brought things to a boil was one night, maybe two or three days
later, when we gathered in the den to watch the latest movie that had
arrived from Netflix, and Mom sat down in the recliner, and Uncle Bob
sat down on the couch. It was just wrong. They didn't sit
apart like that. They'd never sat apart like that. They
always sat together and cuddled. It was just the way the world
was supposed to be!
It was Shannon who took the bull by the horns this time. Don't
ask me why she thought to do this, but she went and climbed up on Uncle
"If Mommy's not going to cuddle with you, I will," she said, laying her head against his shoulder.
What happened then was very strange, at least from the viewpoint of an eleven year old girl with my background.
Uncle Bob got this strange look on his face, and then he turned red, and then he said, "I don't think that's a good idea, sweetheart."
I looked over at Mom, for some reason. She was kind of pinked up
too, and suddenly she got up and went over to where Shannon was still
wiggling around on Uncle Bob's lap, trying to get comfortable. I
mean that's what she was doing. It was obvious to me. She
had just climbed on his lap, like she'd done a million times, and was
trying to get comfortable, like she'd done a million times. It
was completely normal.
Except it wasn't.
I couldn't understand it, but I knew, deep down inside me that
something had changed. I didn't know what it was, and I didn't
know why it had changed. It was just ... different.
Mom sat down next to them on the couch and put her arm around Uncle Bob.
"Are you okay?" she asked.
That confused me. I knew she was talking to either Uncle Bob or
Shannon, but that question didn't make any sense to either of
them. I mean they were just sitting there.
Uncle Bob said, "I don't think so, Lulu." Then, to my sister, he said, "You need to get off of me, honey."
"Why?" asked Shannon.
"Because you're growing up," he said.
By now I was really confused. But I didn't have time to think
about it, because when Shannon didn't climb off of his lap, he put his
hands around her waist and lifted
her off his lap, like she didn't weigh hardly anything. He put
her on Mom's lap, sort of. I mean her arms and legs were kind of
waving around and she was squealing. I think his hands tickled
her a little bit maybe. And Mom was trying to hug her too.
Uncle Bob stood up and he looked normal, except he was really red in
the face and his penis was sticking out.
"I'm sorry!" he blurted.
Mom sort of rolled Shannon off her lap, and she slid off the couch onto the floor with a squawk while Mom stood up.
"Come on," she said, reaching for Uncle Bob's hand.
"I'm really sorry," he said, kind of pleading.
"I know," she said. "Let's go get you taken care of." She turned
and looked first at me and then at Brinn, who was standing there
looking just as confused as I felt. Shannon was sitting on the
floor, looking up. "You three stay right here!" she said.
She sounded like she was mad, like she sounded when she was going to
take one of us into the bedroom for a spanking, and would then come
back for somebody else. We usually got in trouble together, and
when one of us got spanked, we all did, pretty much.
Except she wasn't mad. I could tell. She wasn't happy
exactly. I could tell that too, from her voice, but she wasn't
So anyway, she dragged Uncle Bob into their bedroom and closed the door.
I looked at Brinn, who still looked confused, and then at Shannon, who was in the act of standing up.
"What happened?" I asked, to the room at large.
"Mom threw me on the floor!" said Shannon, whose voice suggested she
was about halfway to being outraged. Shannon was the drama queen
of our family. She got outraged at lots of stuff. Everybody
thinks triplets are all the same, especially identical, but even if
they're fraternal, but they're not the same at all. Shannon was
the emotional one. Brinn was the serious one, who loved reading
and learning and making things. He was the one who analyzed
things and wanted to know how they worked, or why they happened.
I was the adventurous one of us. I climbed higher in the trees,
and didn't mind picking up snakes and all that. I could have fun
in a bare room, just by trying to see how bare it really was.
"She didn't throw you on the floor," I said. "She just got you off Uncle Bob's lap."
"Yeah, but why?" she complained. "I wasn't hurting anything."
"Why'd he say he was sorry?" asked Brinn.
"What did I do?" complained Shannon. "Why'd they have to throw me on the floor?"
"They didn't throw you on the floor!" I insisted. Don't ask me why I felt like I had to defend the adults, but I did.
"Didn't I just have to get up off the floor?" argued Shannon.
"Shhh!" said Brinn, waving his hands. "Listen!"
Shannon and I stopped talking and we heard Mom's voice, through the
door. At first it was just mumbles, but then she yelled "Stop it,
Bob!" She didn't sound hurt or anything, but Brinn started toward
"Brinn!" I whispered. "She said to stay here!"
"I know," he said. He kept going. When he got there, he
stared at the edge of the door and then leaned over and put his face
right by it.
Of course within seconds, Shannon and I were there too. I could
see that when Mom closed the door it hadn't latched. The house
was pretty old, and sometimes doors didn't work quite right. It
didn't matter, usually. Most of the time nobody closed doors for
anything anyway. In a house full of nudists, there's usually not
a whole lot of need for privacy. We girls changed our tampons in
private, but only because Mom said it would gross the boys out if they
So anyway, instead of putting his ear against the door, Brinn was
looking at the crack in it. I could hear better too, now that I
was closer to the door.
"It's not your fault, Bob!" I heard our mother say. "After all, you're a man."
Uncle Bob's laughter barked, but it didn't sound like he was happy.
"I should be able to control myself," he said. "She's just a girl."
"Bob," said Mom, and she was using that extra patient voice that we
knew so well. She used that when we knew something, but didn't
want to admit it and she was determined to get us to do that.
"How old was I when you got interested in me as a girl?"
There was this long silence. He finally spoke and I could just barely hear him. "Twelve."
"And she's almost twelve," said Mom.
"I'm not fourteen any more, Lulu!" he said, really loudly now.
They must have realized they were loud because his voice got softer.
"I'm thirty one now, and I felt like a pervert when I was fourteen!"
"I know that," said Mom. "You were so cute back then, trying to
be a good boy. Just like you're trying to be a good boy now. I
think that's what made me fall in love with you. And I still love
you, Bobby. I'm not mad. You reacted like any guy would."
"We have to start wearing clothes," he said. "At least if I had clothes on my fricking boner wouldn't have shown."
"Bob," said Mom again, in that patient voice. "They're
growing up. Remember that disastrous session we had a week
ago? We didn't handle that very well. And I put them off,
just like every other parent probably does. But they are
growing up, and we need to be honest with them. They're already
living with a huge secret, because of us. They don't need any
"Shannon doesn't need that much truth," he said. "She doesn't need to know she affects men the way she does."
"Bob, honey, you got an erection. She was naked. And she's
at that age where she's beginning to flower physically. So is
Kylie. And Brinn gets erections. I'm surprised he hasn't
gotten them for his sisters. Do you think I don't know why men
get so excited when they see little girls all dolled up?"
"I don't want to get excited over little girls," said Uncle Bob. "I don't want to get excited over anybody except you."
"Awww," she said, and it was quiet for a bit. Then she said,
"Come here, Tiger. You're sweet, but you haven't been stiff like
that this long just because of me. I'm telling you, men are wired
to respond to women, even very young women. But just because you
got hard doesn't mean you actually want to have sex with her. I
know that, Bobby. You just need to believe it too."
"I do!" he insisted. "I don't want to have sex with her. So why did I get this fucking boner?"
"Because you're a man. And don't worry about your boner. I think I can take care of that. Right now, in fact."
Believe me when I tell you my mind was whirling, just about then.
I'll get to an analysis of that in a second. But then Uncle Bob
said something that just blew me away.
"So I get hard for your daughters, and you fuck me limp ... is that the deal?"
Mom said, "That sounds like a wonderful plan to me, lover."
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